![]() ![]() This may seem both funny and true to men who still go around rating women on a scale of attractiveness, the kind who are always out looking for something better.Īfter all, doctors used to diagnose women as “hysterical” because it was easier to blame our periods or our alleged mood swings than to actually be medical professionals and do their jobs. I’m sure there are men who think this is hilarious, but I’m going to tell you what it really is: deeply misogynistic. ![]() This assumes that women care only care about perceived attractiveness and financial stability. To wrap it up, he says that this can be applied to women dating men, too, but that there’s a cute axis and a money axis there. And I’m not going to even discuss the transphobic comments at the end about the women who are super hot but not crazy at all. Never mind that a unicorn is already a term coined to describe a bisexual woman who wants to be with both a man and a woman in a threesome. If someone is above an 8 for hot but below a 5 for crazy, you’ve got yourself a unicorn. From 5–7 level of craziness and from 8–10 hot is what all men should be looking for according to McLendon. Then, there’s a whole zone for dating and a whole zone for marriage and long-term relationships. Apparently, we can be anywhere on this chart at any time, and the men should collect data over time to determine where we belong.īecause, again, men get to determine where we belong and who we are. He lists some specific dangers: redheads, women named Tiffany, strippers, and hairdressers.īut women don’t, apparently, stay conveniently in the box that he’s created for them. From 5 to 8 and below the crazy line, you get the Fun Zone women, and then, of course, there’s the Danger Zone. This scale completely ignores the fact that attraction is entirely subjection, but let’s continue. To clarify, he’s starting right out the gate saying that (a) all women are crazy and (b) women who aren’t “hot” by his definition don’t deserve relationships. As you’ll see, he assumes that women who aren’t a hot level 5 shouldn’t be dated or married and their level of craziness doesn’t even matter. The Hot Crazy Line intersects this graph diagonally. Apparently, the Crazy Axis starts at 4 because all women are at least a 4 in crazy, says Dana McLendon. At this pace, General Surgery is going to pop up next to GI on the hot crazy matrix in the next couple of years.Let’s break down how this graph works. General Surgery used to be hotter, but ever since losing their territory faster than the British Empire, not so much. Radiology is the medical equivalent of 7 minutes in heaven with people who prefer to stay in their own corner of the closet the whole time. ID, GI and Pathology are as unhot as you get, nothing about infections, poop and dead people/dead parts of live people is hot. Its almost like they dye their hair with whatever combination of fluids ends up in that creepy little bag at the end of the bed they have. The hottest specialties are clearly Ortho (biceps), Neurosurgery (brains), and plastic surgery (all the other hot parts) with progressively increasing levels of crazy with Plastic surgeons only being out-crazied by OB/Gyn who will literally have a new hair color every delivery. Even psychiatry is hotter than ER because at least they have regular work hours. ![]() ER doctors are only slightly less crazy and slightly hotter than their patients. Its not super hot, no one says “oh man, you’re an ER doctor, that’s hot” at least no one I know. ER is for crazy people, we all know this. They straddle the hot crazy axis about as low as you go. Nephrology is about as un-hot as a specialty gets, but its also not real crazy, Nephrologist parties are lame. Let’s talk about a couple sample specialties. The Official Hot Crazy Matrix of Medicine Your goal if you’re a normal sane person, is to pick a specialty below the hot crazy line, that is a specialty that’s at least as hot as it is crazy. In the middle is your hot crazy line right here, very important that you keep in mind where the hot crazy line is. No one less than a 4 crazy agrees to spend most of college actually studying followed by 4 years busting their asses to get through med school. Crazy is measured from 4 to 10, because of course there’s no such thing as a physician who is not at least a 4 crazy. You have your crazy axis, and your hot axis. ![]() I’ve developed this on my own over 13 years in medicine. It’s everything a young medical student needs to know about picking the specialty that matches their own desire for hotness balanced against their own tolerance of craziness. BOSTON, MA – Okay, so this is the Universal Hot Crazy Matrix of Medical Specialties. ![]()
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